ThinkThought #24 : Haughty Indifference

Have you ever realized that there are some things out there that frustrate you more than anything else in the world, and you just simply can't explain why? Often they are insignificant isms that shouldn't affect your daily life whatsoever, but they do. Whenever I see a man completely shave off his sideburns, I find myself obsessing over how utterly nonsensical he must be to shed his ear turtlenecks, and I automatically assume that I would never speak to him, as I never speak with sideburnless freaks like that. Assimilate? No thank you. Let us be rid of them.


It's the same every time I watch an awards show and the winner, as they stand triumphantly in front of a crowd of adoring fans and malevolent peers, thanks God for their win. God has nothing to do with you winning the Teen Choice Hot Summer Crush award, Justin Bieber. If God is a considerate and rational being, then I am certain, in fact, that he has had nothing to do whatsoever with any of your fame or success, Justin. Now go back and coddle your $53 million while I hold my empty piggy bank and gently weep.

What I have recently discovered is that not only do I hate overzealous trimmers and god-fearing celebrities, but more importantly, customers who seem to find it entirely necessary to over-share. Working at Shoppers, I encounter my fair share of people hoping to discuss their classes, grand-children, or drunken binges, all of which I have no interest in, but am always able to feign a smile and force out monosyllabic responses, just enough for them to feel worthwhile. One such recent occurrence, however, changed all of that.

A certain man who was, how shall we say, unafraid to eat more than his share, came to the counter. Conversation ensued as per the usual.

"Man I was so wrecked last night, went to such a rager, it was absolutely insane!"

"Ah,"

"Yeah man. One of my buds was like God, you must have been living the dream, and I was like yeah man, now I'm living the nightmare."

"Wow..."

At this point in time I look down at what he's placed on the counter. A bottle of Pepto Bismol. Makes sense. For the first time, I try to shrug off my sometimes haughty indifference and engage in verbal communication with another human being that I may not know, but still could very well deserve my respect.

"So you feeling pretty hungover then from last night? That's why you're getting Pepto?"

"Naw man. Ate some bad curry last night, and it's coming back out the other end pretty bad."

I have decided to stick with haughty indifference.