ThinkThought #14 : Failure

I'm getting into failure in a big way. I'm also getting into potato salad and crying at night as a result of my failing. Granted, I have never failed before, despite coming close at times. As this year has gone by, however, I have realized the utter lack of knowledge I posses when it comes to the French language, and the lack of motivation I have when it comes to furthering my knowledge of this, one of the most romantic of the Romance languages. Michael O'Hagan, why cant your rhetoric and/or wide variety of vests and/or sweaters and/or man bags motivate me to do well in your class. Oh this, yes this, is the greatest travesty in my young, nubile life.

Every night, I lay upon my large bed-made-for-three, head resting against three pillows, listening to the gentle whisper of "3" by Britney Spears, and I realize that not even the wise words of a worn out whore (e.g. Britney) can help me now in my situation. It is because of this that I have realized, despite my greatest efforts, that it is time for a new direction in life.

As Galileo once said, "I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him.".... so. That's neat.

It is because of this that I have decided I need to put aside my insecurities (the French ass ones only)(Yvonne, that is a French ass name), and learn to love my illiteracy. And my illegitimacy. My illegitimates. My illegitimate children. I have learned to love my illegitimate children, of which there are many, and to, perhaps, give them the names they deserve, rather than "Kumstayne" and "Tam Pawn". I will also stop referring to myself as "The Love Slave Sexy Machine of Might and DOOM Upon Yo' Weave Gurl" (TLSSMOMADUYWG for short, of course). I think this is the best for everyone.

All in all, I will not fail French. I will win French. So many times. 4 times. I just got soo many French ass points.